The term “gaslighting” has been around for decades but has recently spread like wildfire. Social media is riddled with descriptions of gaslighting during medical visits. Most often this surfaces when we feel overlooked or placated during issues that aren’t resolved.
At a time when we’re encouraged to speak out against injustice and take a courageous stance, “gaslighting” has become a household term. But is it being used correctly?
We’ll address an overview of gaslighting and how to recognize signs that accompany it. In addition, we’re going to take a closer look specifically at medical gaslighting, associated points, and how to prevent feeling that it’s happening to you.
In This Article
Signs of Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a term that describes gaining power over another person. It might be a work situation, with family, or in a personal relationship.
An important point is that true gaslighting is a method for abusers to take over a situation and maintain the upper hand.
While this is often the case, gaslighting isn’t always intentionally planned. Sometimes it’s used as a way to be “right” or selfishly gain leverage.
Another point about authentic gaslighting is that it takes place over a period of time. This is to increase control and even to portray the other person as “crazy” or misjudging the circumstance.
At its core, this action leaves you questioning thoughts, beliefs, and abilities. Let’s look at a few signs of gaslighting.
Manipulation
Gaslighting is manipulation at its finest. When assessing it versus normal conflict, gaslighting tends to chip away at self-esteem and confidence. As you’re put through the ringer time and again, many emotional and psychological difficulties emerge.
This type of intended manipulation creates a barrage of negative points and drives continuous issues. The purpose is for the instigator to render you powerless and continue to gain the upper hand. This is accomplished by actions and conversations that are demeaning and initiate questions of worth and truth. It changes your mindset.
Coercion
Coercion is at the root of true gaslighting. This point involves forcing you to act or believe in something and can even use threats to complete the purpose. It’s not a once and done approach.
Often bullying is used as a method of accomplishing gains through coercion. This action can be a part of gaslighting.
If retaliation is attempted against the unwanted mindset, continuous offense makes it difficult to gain traction.
In addition, if you feel pressured to adopt a particular line of thinking—although you disagree—it’s possible that coercion is involved.
Gaining Control
In general, the overall point of gaslighting is gaining control. This might be accomplished by lying or deflecting personal issues. An attempt to convince you of an altered reality is at the core of this control.
If you second guess your abilities and decisions based on what someone else is continuously telling you, it’s time to take a deeper look. Forced lack of confidence is only one sign of gaslighting, but it’s worth your attention.
Do you feel a diminished mindset based on what you hear or are led to believe? Is this common and continuous? If so, it’s possible you’re involved in a routine of gaslighting.
Points that Create Medical Gaslighting
Now that we’ve looked at points that accompany authentic gaslighting, we’ll address the scope of using the term in the medical realm.
While some issues happen occasionally, using the word “gaslighting” may not be the accurate choice. A deeper understanding that gaslighting involves manipulation, coercion, and a desire to maintain control creates a baseline to assess the right term.
When you visit a doctor and leave feeling dismissed, your emotions are real. But is the sentiment created by authentic gaslighting as is so often stated?
Distress created when unable to get answers from a professional is a true issue. But instead of actual gaslighting from long term effects and manipulation, perhaps you’re experiencing “medical dissatisfaction.”
Expectation often creates disillusionment when meeting with a medical professional. Rather than misguided intent, other reasons can create inability to accomplish a desired outcome at your appointment.
There might be true cases of gaslighting with a chronic illness or medical issue, but it’s not likely the culprit most times. We’ll look at actions that take place during medical appointments which encourage the term “gaslighting.”
An important side note first: You have rights as a patient. This doesn’t change and should always be honored by professionals. This point is true in all cases, and you should never be afraid to ask for specifics. In addition, you can’t be denied a look at your medical records or pressured to avoid getting a second opinion.
Also, gaining an understanding about the term gaslighting doesn’t change the difficulties and symptoms you’re experiencing. Words don’t discount struggles or make them disappear.
The upcoming points are not intended to excuse feelings of malaise from medical appointments. Instead, the idea is to help you assess the context of gaslighting during your sessions.
Power Platform
Medical situations are already a source of imbalanced control. Most of us feel as though there’s a power platform based on the education and abilities of a professional.
This mindset promotes the assumption that we’ll enter with questions and leave with answers. We’re in a vulnerable state and want greater understanding of what’s taking place. This can drive the idea of gaslighting if we feel the situation doesn’t end well.
There’s a certain amount of self-preservation that happens during a medical interaction. We want to maintain dignity, and a professional wants to share their knowledge and solve issues. We have a sense of dependency on the professional.
However, physicians may not know an answer to solve the problem. Perhaps they haven’t seen or experienced a similar situation. Even with years of schooling, there will be situations that are difficult to explain. The body has mysteries yet to be unlocked and there are things to deal with behind the scenes in healthcare.
If the power platform is crumbled by the unknown, best practice is for the professional to admit it. Simply hearing a doctor admit they don’t know an answer often creates respect, although it’s not very reassuring.
There’s automatically a degree of control in the situation, but don’t relinquish all power to the professional. If you get the feeling it’s not a good match, or that something is missing, don’t hesitate to make a change.
All professionals are not on an even playing field. Some are more experienced than others. With recent medical onsets, environmental circumstances, and new situations arising constantly, an evaluation can be like finding a needle in a haystack.
Realizing the reality of the body’s intricacies can help put a clearer perspective on expectations and what is considered gaslighting.
Patient Redirecting
In the event of a gap, or lack of understanding in treatment, a referral should be made by the professional for additional assessment. A colleague—or specialist—might have more knowledge of the circumstance.
Sometimes during an unknown situation, redirecting takes place.
An immediate response may be side stepped as other people become involved. This isn’t usually the preference based on our imagined view of the visit. Seeking deeper knowledge can create an unintentional waiting game.
This might cause anxiety, frustration, and even animosity. It ends up a basis for using the term “gaslighting.”
It is often compounded by the lack of connection in our medical system. Unless you actively link each professional you see, they will not have the ability to share information with each other. This becomes stressful and takes footwork on your part that may not be initially understood.
Regardless of the cause, when leaving an appointment without resolution, there’s a feeling of emptiness. It’s assumed that the medical professional is satisfied with steps taken. This can lead to disdain if we have more questions than answers.
Dealing with Delays
One of the most common medical issues that encourages the word “gaslighting” is feeling a diversion from the doctor. This could be forgetfulness about a previous discussion, discounting an issue, or anything that feels like diverting rather than addressing.
Sometimes this happens due to difficulty with communication. It might be caused by our increased stress, overreaction, or emotions that surface during a medical visit.
There may not be an answer at the time. A delay sometimes takes place to better understand the situation. This isn’t by malicious intent but to gather more data. Sometimes a professional makes the decision to revisit an issue at a later time to allow for additional assessment.
If this is warranted, clear communication of this point should be expressed. Your health is important, and it matters to know what’s taking place. If not, it’s easy to feel overlooked and the term “gaslighting” comes up.
Also, some physicians have amazing bedside manner, but there are doctors that don’t take extra time to interact with their patients. This consensus has become all too familiar. Time constraints based on increased caseloads due to lower insurance reimbursements compound this problem.
We view a medical visit as the place for solving problems. However, there’s still a business entity behind the scenes. Even a physician with best intentions sometimes gets swallowed by the system. This is another issue that increases use of the term “gaslighting.”
How to Prevent Medical Dissatisfaction
Chances are one or more of the situations mentioned touched on an experience you’ve had in the medical arena. Even though there aren’t solutions to every situation, we’re discussing why “gaslighting” might not be the appropriate term.
Overall, these circumstances are usually temporary rather than being drawn out for years. Remember the points that are involved with real gaslighting include extended time.
Medical dissatisfaction happens frequently, especially with illnesses during recent years. Extended sickness and new symptoms continue to challenge medical minds daily.
Although this might be the case, it’s often hard to tolerate discontentment from medical visits. Our expectation is to be healed and understand our situation. Period.
When you’re already overwhelmed or discouraged by the current situation, giving power to a medical professional to determine your mood isn’t helpful. While it wears on you to face the unknown, staying mentally strong gives your body a baseline for healing.
Entering into these instances optimistically—but realistically—allows you to gain more acceptance. That’s not to say you should give in, but simply stay proactive while knowing when to shift.
Most doctors aren’t in the gaslighting mindset but are overly consumed while looking for an answer to your issue. Every physician is different, so there’s no way to lump all situations into one. Looking at parameters that surround each circumstance is far more important than jumping to conclusions.
It’s important that you feel heard by medical professionals and have confidence to speak on your behalf. No one likes leaving an appointment with more questions than answers.
Let’s look at some ways to aid communication and the process instead of falling into emotional imbalance from medical dissatisfaction.
Listen to Your Gut
If you have no specific answers after a complete medical assessment, it’s not necessarily a failed attempt. Sometimes trials are needed to gain knowledge. You know your body better than anyone. If you think something is wrong, it’s likely the case but might take a little more time to resolve.
Instead of allowing someone to convince you otherwise, stand your ground. Listening to your body creates power and assists with documenting symptoms and timelines. Advocacy is of utmost importance during a time of unknowns. Don’t alter it based on what someone else is saying.
Record Your Own Notes
In a world of electronic medical records and patient portals, it’s simple to see firsthand what was documented during a visit with a professional. The problem is many don’t comprehend medical jargon nor understand what is written.
Rather than rely on records, make your own notes after each visit. Keeping up with your version of assessments and treatments allows much greater reliability and understanding. It also helps paint the whole picture rather than forgetting or misconstruing parts of a conversation.
Presentation of Symptoms/Issues
This point is one of the most common issues of miscommunication and dissatisfaction when attending a medical visit. The physician gains a snapshot into your situation based on your explanation.
You can help communication by using methods such as describing pain level by numbers, using percentages to report improvement, and staying concise with explanations.
In addition, it’s not necessary to inform a professional of your research. While search engines add an extra layer of knowledge, they shouldn’t be used to self-diagnose. Assessment in person versus written assumptions are beneficial while figuring out an issue.
Change Providers
If you feel it’s time for a change, or you’re uncomfortable with a current medical situation, don’t hesitate to make a move. Remember, you have rights and should never feel pressured, trapped, or as if no one cares.
If there’s a personality conflict, or you’re not getting the answers you seek, a second opinion is a good decision. It’s better to be assured than wish you had made different choices.
It’s possible to change professionals or even see someone different within the same practice. We often feel self-conscious when this comes up, but your wellness and peace about the situation are important. More so than worrying about how someone feels with the request.
Final Thoughts About Medical Gaslighting
We’ve uncovered information about issues that are considered gaslighting in medical situations. In truth, it would be difficult for gaslighting to take place during regular medical visits. If an issue has become prolonged, and true points of gaslighting are present, then taking action is a must.
Use the provided helpful hints to promote a beneficial and comfortable session with your medical professional. You should never feel imbalanced after a visit nor as knowledgeable as when you arrived.
Taking a stance for understanding actual “gaslighting” versus “medical dissatisfaction” can help with maintaining better health and improve your overall wellness.